Wiki defines impostor syndrome as a"psychological phenomenon in which people are unable to internalize their accomplishments. Despite external evidence of their competence, those with the syndrome remain convinced that they are frauds and do not deserve the success they have achieved." Hmm sounds all too familiar...
Recently we have been struggling with trying to convince some of our highly intelligent and promising students that there were indeed brilliant. Their self doubt seems to make them convinced that they won't graduate or get good jobs when they do - all the while we are telling them that they will in fact graduate and trying to convince them to apply to good places. The common consensus was that as grad students we had all felt self doubt, so this was normal and we should only keep encouraging them.
A subsequent discussion among the "younger" post-docs and we voiced sentiments like "I don't know what I'm doing" "everyone else seems to know more" "I'm not sure why I was hired". So much for this being a grad student issue. Some general looking into each others contributions and skills ensued and we all felt a little better...maybe... A senior post-doc then joined us, someone who we think is very knowledgeable, skilled and has got it together. He had been applying for an award...he slumps down with a "I don't think I'm good enough"! - does this ever end?
Saturday, October 04, 2014
Are you Indian?
Not a lot of things make me annoyed as much as being asked this question. Not a lot of things brings out the "rude me". Asking this question as a conversation opener is almost guaranteed to make me rude. It is also a source of great amusement to my friends. So why does this question have such an irrational effect on me...
Well to start with I look south Asian - so generally I don't mind an assumption from people who are not from the region, that I may belong to the largest country in the region. Statistically there is a good chance that I am from there. My problem stems from having to insist that I am not from there and still have people refuse to believe it. I am born Sri Lankan, and I cannot link any ancestry back to India (and I can trace back as far as 6 generations). I have also never been there so I have as much local knowledge as can be gained from TV/Internet.
First annoyance started when I moved to Singapore and was required to declare my race. Let's move on from the need to declare a race in this day and age - that is a discussion for another day. I was given the option of Malay, Chinese, Indian or Other. As far as I am concerned Indian is a nationality and not a race. I don't identify with it as my race (whatever that is). So I go for Other and put Sri Lankan as my race seeing as how the other options were nationalities too. I have trouble with officials accepting me as "other" when they see me in person. In fact I have had cases where my form as been "corrected" for me.
Throughout my travels or living and working in other countries, I've had several conversations which have opened with "Are you from India?"/"Are you Indian". When I answer in the negative, it is generally followed by "But you look Indian". So? Another classic "So do you speak Hindi?" - no! "Why not?" - why would I? It is not a language officially spoken in ANY of the countries I have lived in. "But you have a bhindhi/pottu/dot" ... Er yes, I am Hindu/Tamil - neither of which are exclusive to India. Just as much as wearing a headscarf is not exclusive to someone from Pakistan for example. Or being a white caucasian doesn't mean you are from Britain or must speak English.
Why does it make me rude? Often these questions are asked of me by random strangers who are from the region. I have tired of insisting. I am also tired of people from the region who seem to only want to have something to do with me if my answer to the question is yes. Am guilty of generalizing that everyone who asks that question is going to be the same... but having had the formula repeated countless times in countless locations I have grown wary. Next time maybe just talk to me about the weather!
Well to start with I look south Asian - so generally I don't mind an assumption from people who are not from the region, that I may belong to the largest country in the region. Statistically there is a good chance that I am from there. My problem stems from having to insist that I am not from there and still have people refuse to believe it. I am born Sri Lankan, and I cannot link any ancestry back to India (and I can trace back as far as 6 generations). I have also never been there so I have as much local knowledge as can be gained from TV/Internet.
First annoyance started when I moved to Singapore and was required to declare my race. Let's move on from the need to declare a race in this day and age - that is a discussion for another day. I was given the option of Malay, Chinese, Indian or Other. As far as I am concerned Indian is a nationality and not a race. I don't identify with it as my race (whatever that is). So I go for Other and put Sri Lankan as my race seeing as how the other options were nationalities too. I have trouble with officials accepting me as "other" when they see me in person. In fact I have had cases where my form as been "corrected" for me.
Throughout my travels or living and working in other countries, I've had several conversations which have opened with "Are you from India?"/"Are you Indian". When I answer in the negative, it is generally followed by "But you look Indian". So? Another classic "So do you speak Hindi?" - no! "Why not?" - why would I? It is not a language officially spoken in ANY of the countries I have lived in. "But you have a bhindhi/pottu/dot" ... Er yes, I am Hindu/Tamil - neither of which are exclusive to India. Just as much as wearing a headscarf is not exclusive to someone from Pakistan for example. Or being a white caucasian doesn't mean you are from Britain or must speak English.
Why does it make me rude? Often these questions are asked of me by random strangers who are from the region. I have tired of insisting. I am also tired of people from the region who seem to only want to have something to do with me if my answer to the question is yes. Am guilty of generalizing that everyone who asks that question is going to be the same... but having had the formula repeated countless times in countless locations I have grown wary. Next time maybe just talk to me about the weather!
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